I've been asked out dozens of bo in my life, and no one has ever used the word 'date. Are people really saying this to each other? And it's not clumsy? Aren't there Would u like to go out on a date suaver ways to put it? Maybe it's my own bias, but desirable men leave a SLIVER Og not talking about game-playing, I'm not talking about 'let's hang out' - that shit is lame of ambiguity, don't they?
Am I the only one who shudders a little at this advice? Anyway, not a huge deal, but it always baffles me that the primary advice to awkward young men is to ask so awkwardly.
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Is this a scene from a romantic comedy you're writing? Using the word "date" comes with a benefit that other somewhat-synonymous phrases "go out Yes, that phrasing is comparatively awkward and formal, but only because you're actually taking the risk and declaring up front that you're romantically interested in the person, versus other phrases which can be misconstrued or misrepresented accidentally or on purpose by either party to mean friendship.
This could totally have been an AskMe rather than a MeTa. Can you link to an example where someone advocates using the word "date" when asking someone out? Askme tends to live in an idealist realm, so the answers given are usually the ones Would u like to go out on a date are probably the best way to say things in the sense that there would be no ambiguity or fritteringbut are not actually how real humans full of awkward feelings actually talk to each other.
These questions are most Would u like to go out on a date about signs and signals and reading the ambiguity and does she like Smart n final tues single ladies xxx Iowa City or is she just friendly and the people involved in them are demonstrating their general inability to read those signs and signals which is why they have turned to AskMe for help.
In order to go on a date, you must have a second party to accompany you. 1.) Firstly, make sure your potential date is single, and available to date. If you feel like the date was a success, a hug is a simple, yet affective way to show you had a good time. if you take your woman to a McDs on the first date, well 9 out of 10 times it. It would be nice if only the men of our dreams asked us out, but you need to go back to sleep for that to happen every single time. 10 Reasons You Should Say Yes to a Date You're Not Sure. 'Would you like to go on a date with me?' versus 'Want to have dinner on Friday night?' I get it though, I get it. Some people REALLY like spelling it out, and hey, my question was answered. Do some people really ask each other out like this? Turns out, yes. Power to them. posted by namesarehard at PM on February 13, [3 favorites].
People who need AskMe's help with that sort of thing are best served by eliminating the ambiguity and just flat out asking. In Toronto in grade 5 it was "going around. I wouldn't have agreed to if I'd realized it was a date.
Yeah, I think Jacquilynne probably has it. Suaveness Hamilton nude chat isn't part of the equation if ambiguity is Ladies want real sex MO Kansas city 64108 so much anxiety. And no, this would not be an askme.
There's no problem to be solved, it'd be removed immediately. Yes, this advise is given seemingly constantly. I usually advise saying something like "do you want to hang out? And people are a lot more comfortable and get better results when they speak in their natural idiom.
I get vicarious flop-sweats just picturing someone awkwardly stammering out, "Do you want to go on a d-d-date with me? I think this came up because of this AskMe. I think using the actual word "date" makes a lot of sense in that scenario, because the person being asked out is someone the asker has been friends with, so using the word "date" makes clear this is not just another friend outing.
The asker is also young and has social anxiety from previous questions. In general I think erring on the side of being more forthcoming is a good thing, rather than dropping hints and expecting people Single rich women wants serious relationship pick up on them, so I guess I'm surprised that you're surprised that people are advocating coming right out and calling it a date.
Awkward young men tend to be bad at reading other people and social situations. In my 20s, I always had trouble telling Would u like to go out on a date a women was going out or hanging out with me romantically versus as a friend.
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My first "date" with my now-wife was something I thought was a date and she thought was just two new friends hanging out. She would have gone on a date with me, but didn't know that's what I was trying to do. Pn line, the sauve guys aren't the ones asking these Chat miami sex.
In the case where there's genuine confusion, yes, it needs to be gotten around somehow. But using a scripted phrase that sounds right out of "Leave it to Beaver" is going to lead to horrible, awkward embarrassment and humiliation for the asker much more often than not. The most recent example i've seen of this is here. I don't think leaving a sliver of ambiguity would help the OP, if he wants to move from "girl who is a friend" to "girlfriend" he's going to have to take a risk and be more explicit.
Saying let's hang out won't make Would u like to go out on a date clear that Well Lubbock a shot i guess wants a different type of interaction with her.
Heh, everyone's points are well taken. Still, I would say some anxiety over ambiguity in the early phases of dating needs to be tolerated, and this advice, while it might be geared toward the unsuave Would u like to go out on a date, is making them even a bit datd suave.
Not a huge deal, just an amused observation. People who are good at giving and interpreting social cues can pull off the ambiguous phrasing, because they imbue that ambiguous phrasing with clear, unambiguous intent. People who are not good at giving or interpreting social cues try to use them anyway, because they're told this Ladies want hot sex NY Bethpage 11714 desirable to do, and then they end up in a Wiuld of anxiety and miscommunication and then write a word AskMe.
I'm someone who can suss out, with fairly high accuracy, when someone is interested in me non-platonically. When I've been wrong, it's usually on the side of false negative: I assume no attraction from the other party, when in fact they are interested.
16 Things Women Wish Men Would Do On Dates | HuffPost Life
This happens pretty much exclusively because 1 the other person has suppressed all their signal giving out of awkwardness or terror, and 2 he did not replace it with verbal clarity, such Fall River Wisconsin horny wives using the words "date" or "girlfriend" or what have you.
If you give me nothing to work with--no recognizable flirting, no verbal Mareeba cove women sex, I will NOT know that you have a crush on me. Because the askme situations are usually time sensitive, it isn't helpful to say, "train yourself to become a stronger observer and signaler of human intention by next Thursday.
Speaking as a NZer, 'date' is definitely an imported Americanism. But it's a useful imported Americanism because our subdued deadpan Kiwi nature means we need all the help we can get in matters of the heart. But I think the key is that, if a situation is so dire or so confusing that the asker has resorted to AskMe, we are beyond "more often than not. I'm glad I didn't try to be suave or coy.
It's also worth noting that "suave" is not a Would u like to go out on a date admired trait. Sincere awkwardness is at least sincere, and almost everyone admires sincerity. Faux awkwardness by someone who actually is "suave" is the worst though!
I agree with this post. I always see people getting this advice, Would u like to go out on a date then I try to think through my history of asking people out and being asked out, and extremely rarely is the word 'date' ever used between us. Maybe one in five times at the drastic most. I think there are other ways to let someone know that it's a date that you're asking them on, when asking them - however, it may be hard to put advice to replicate it into words. I don't find ambiguity desirable, myself.
Say "Yes" or "No", please.
"During the date, refrain from saying, 'I'm better at being single than in a relationship So do you want to go out again?'" -- Janice Songer. 10 Awesome First Date Ideas Guaranteed To Impress on whether there's a chance your date will get to see it at the end of the evening. Whether you feel like going all out or keeping it relatively safe, this list has you. Literally Just + Date Ideas So You And Bae Will Never Be Bored Odds are, there's something you both wanna check out in your city. Set parameters like how many clues you both get and see how fast you can solve.
My husband and I have argued about that in the past about non-romantic issues. If one ho them said we should "go out" and I was still single, I would not think they were asking me on a date. I would, in fact, recruit others to come along. I don't think I've ever asked a dating question but I've certainly read a whole bunch of them here. Because of the general advice to be direct and unambiguous it's convinced me to be much more direct and unambiguous, and it's made my dating life heaps easier and more fun.
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So now I answer lots of dating questions and tell people to be direct and unambiguous. Maybe you don't find it desirable when people say "hi Rate like you and I would like us to go out on a date" but I do.
And the dudes I date sure as fuck think it's desirable when I do it. Go ahead and be baffled all you want.
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Maybe things have changed dramatically in the past decade, but when I was single, "hang out" was super ambiguous and often meant "yeah we'll probably make out at some point but this isn't, like, a dating thing. A lot of people send super-vague signals when they're interested in someone, and a lot of people are oblivious to signals.Big Cock Personal Ads
Better to be likf. But if you're really smooth, you don't need this advice in the first place, and you probably don't get stuck in are-we-dating-or-not limbo.
Besides, suaveness is overrated. It makes for fun dates or hangouts or whatever it's called when the kids make out on my lawnbut doesn't have a ton of use in a long-term relationship.
With both my current boyfriend and my ex, the explicit use Would u like to go out on a date the word 'date' was what signaled from me in the first case, to me in the latter the shift Best pussy in Athens Louisiana romantic interest in a clear and unambiguous way. In fact, every potentially romantic thing I've been on in probably the last ten years explicitly used the word date, unless we'd already made our feelings known in some other way.
I have not infrequently clarified by asking datee you mean hang out, or a date? Yeah, see, I've put on the receiving end of that question. And then been rather astonished when the dude who I was lile interested in platonically tried to get all up in my business.
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Horribly awkward and unpleasant for everyone. Much better to have any awkwardness dealt with beforehand than after someone going in for a kiss and being rebuffed. Yeah, it sucks to turn someone down if they ask too on a date; nobody likes inflicting that sort of hurt on others.
But it's a lot worse when they've been thinking all evening there's something special going on when there isn't. So very much this!
It's really flattering and hot when someone says "I like you. Do you like me? Keeping 'plausible deniability' is saying "Well I like you kinda, but not enough to actually say so. Hope you took your telepathy pills today. Woupd leaves room for fear. Dating and romance is such a baffling guessing game that I appreciate any and everything someone can do to mitigate that fear.
I've made this point over and over in these threads, gk it's just not something anyone actually acknowledges. No one says this! Other than the current thread already linked, the op gets patted on the back here for it, first post hereand hereand here.
I could go on forever.