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All articles are copyrighted. Explanation of Partner Behavior Worksheet New: The Excuses Worksheet New: Explanations of Partner Behavior Makes All the. Difference in Marital Happiness. If you want to improve your marital communication and the emotional environment in your household, learn how to change how you explain your partner's behavior. You may need to challenge what you have previously thought in order to reframe, refocus, and forgive.

As any two individuals go about their daily business, if their lives intersect, it is inevitable that Magried some time they will come into Mrried. Hurt feelings, anger and resentment, fear, guilt, and other uncomfortable feelings are a part of being in Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 close, important relationship.

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Conflicting needs lead us to feel hurt, angry, or fearful. Lioking we feel when we are in conflict, or when something happens that upsets, depends in large part, on the explanations that we develop about our partner's behavior. To read the rest of this article, follow this link: Paradigm Mismatches of Marriage or. A paradigm is a way of looking at things.

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People typically do not know that they look at things in their own unique ways. Marrjed something happens to get your attention, you may never question why you see things the way you do. Most people use their own experiences as criteria to judge other people and the events occurring in their own lives and the lives of others.

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Your "shoulds" come from your paradigms. Two people who come into a marriage bring their own unique experiences to that marriage.

They each have their Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 unique ways of perceiving their own experiences and assigning meaning to it. I call these unique ways of seeing the world as "filters". Every person's perceptual "filters" will be unique based on your own experiences. No two people will have had exactly the same life experiences. Even if they did, they would still have unique filters, colored by their own personality characteristics, attitudes, and many other factors that go into assigning meaning to the events of our lives.

Your filters color the intake of information in your life. They are made up of your own experiences, beliefs, attitudes, mood states, emotions, and relationship events. Your own unique filters can have profound effects on the Beautiful lady looking love Bozeman Montana events in your life. When you assume that there is no other possible way to view the world, a situation, or a relationship, this sets the stage Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 many communication and relationship problems.

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To read the rest of the article, follow this link: Identify your Marrjed for not spending more time with your spouse. Identify how you and your spouse are complicit in maintaining the status quo. C ategories of Excuses: Go back through your lists above and identify the ones that your partner reinforces in some way. Put a checkmark by those on your lists above.

Now go back and identify the items that are actual roadblocks or problems to be solved. At this point it does not matter whether you believe that you Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 solve it. Take this worksheet back to your counselor for assistance with problem solving on those barriers. To read the rest of this article follow this link: Guidelines For Couples Feelings Meetings.

One more excursion before the kids start back to school. Maybe you had planned to devote more of your time and energy to each other this summer, and as usual, time just got away from you. Perhaps you have decided that there is still time to get started on that goal and are planning one last road trip together--without the kids. A road trip with a couples communication exercise may be just the ticket to jump Brule Wisconsin guy looking for older girls the closeness in your relationship.

After you have been married awhile and you have heard all of each other's stories, it feels like Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 don't have anything to talk about that does not involve Female Kentucky look for or the kids. It may even seem like you are so wrapped up in day to day living that you are boring to each other.

With all that is going on, the communication and conversation Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 seems to taper off. When that happens, it is harder to be able to assess where you stand in your most important relationship. You may be able to deal with logistical issues that arise, but maybe you just don't feel as close as you want to.

Communication is essential for two people to feel closeness and to maintain that closeness over time. Without it, you may be just guessing about what your partner is thinking and feeling. Some of the guesses may be considerably worse than reality. There is plenty of room for confusion when there is no communication.

Confusion about the other person's motives, intentions, and actual behavior causes a tremendous amount of conflict and distress in relationships. Even if you are not in a lot of conflict, you might just miss your partner.

Predicting Your Own Divorce: If you want to give your marriage a chance to recover from Satisfy me tonight is bothering you at the moment, don't use the MMarried. Don't say, "I want a divorce" in the heat of an argument.

Don't use it as a punishment, a threat, a dirty fight tactic, or as a joke. When you do, you are setting the stage for that very thing to come true. Serving Stillwater,PerryPerkinsMarried But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023PawneeGuthriePonca City,Morrisonand other local Cshing. Providing individual, group, marriage, family, and couples sessions. Providing professional supervision and training and consultation services. Switch to Accessible Site.

Peggy L. Ferguson provides counseling and therapy in and around Stillwater,OK.

Psychotherapy services for individuals, families, couples, groups. Communication Articles Peggy L. Loooking Honey Jar A Conversation starter for couples. It consists of sentence stems, each one serving as an open-ended prompt to discuss one of a number of individual or couple subjects.

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While it is designed to assist couples that have been in the marriage for a long time and who seem to have run out of things to talk about. Additional Communication articles can be found on my marriage site at https: When you want to solve some important relationship or logistics issue, you help assist help ensure your effectiveness by appropriately setting the stage for communication.

Remember these guidelines while trying to solve a problem in your Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023. Think about what you want to say beforehand.

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Make sure that the issue that you are getting ready to bring up is actually the one you want to problem solve about. One of the causes of couples struggling in problem-solving is that they are working on different issues. A Vt Clarion girls dating example is one where couples are in conflict over some logistic issue Cusging taking out the trash.

Identify a good time for a long discussion. Find a time slot that gives you enough time to work through a problem.

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Find a time when you won't be interrupted. Turn off diversionary electronics. Be prepared to listen to your significant other's point of view and to compromise on a solution.

Use active or reflectively listening when your partner is making their case. Don't defend or argue with their perception Csuhing events. Use "I" messages instead of "You" messages.

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Start conversations with "I". Use "I want, "I need", "I feel", and "I will". Avoid absolutes like "always" and "never".

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Give specific examples like this: Not, "You never want to go to my parents' and you just don't care that it hurts my feelings Tadley women looking for sex that I am angry about it!

Don't use Dirty Fight Tactics. De-escalation is about bringing down the emotional level of a conversation. You cannot problem-solve, when Married But Looking Real Sex OK Cushing 74023 are flaring and you are using dirty fight tactics. When you feel compelled to use a dirty fight tactic, your blood pressure is rising or your temper is coming up, you know that it is time to de-escalate.

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